The secret to losing weight

I'm so proud of myself for how far I've come. After having gained the "freshman 15" and another 5-10 lbs on top of that in the years that followed, I've put to use the secret of losing weight.

Want to know what it is? You're not going to be super impressed. It's not a cleanse, or a fad diet. I never starved myself or purged with laxatives. I never even stepped on a scale all summer because I was afraid of being obsessed with my progress.

The secret is a lifestyle diet and exercise. I called it a "lifestyle" diet because I HATE the word "diet". When I was a kid, the word diet was used to describe the types of foods that animals ate to live. For human beings, the word diet has become just the opposite: it's all the food you either do or don't eat, that is so far from our naturally required foods.

Let me explain and then I'll tell you how I got myself back to a healthy weight and body composition.

Here's an example:
The diet of the black bear: berries, fruits, insects, plants, fish, and sometimes small rodents
The diet of the gardner snake: small rodents, frog eggs, slugs, worms, amphibians, lizards
The diet of North American humans (what it should be): plants, vegetables, fruits, nuts, seeds, fish, birds/poultry, other mammals such as elk, deer, cow, bison.
The diet of humans (what it actually is in North America): maltodextrin, canola and/or corn and/or soybean oil, corn syrup, preservatives, caramel colour, artificial flavour, natural flavour (WTF??)

That last list is what is found in Cheez Whiz and in pretty much anything packaged on the shelves of your grocery store. There isn't even cheese in Cheez Whiz. Just some whey and "milk ingredients". I remember eating that stuff as a kid, putting it on celery and on crackers.

I also remember packing Fruit Gushers for school. Want to know what's in them? Pears from concentrate, sugar, dried corn syrup, corn syrup, modified corn starch, fructose, grape juice from concentrate, partially hydrogenated cottonseed oil, maltodextrin, cottonseed oil, carrageenan, citric acid, glycerin, monoglycerides, sodium citrate, malic acid, ascorbic acid, natural flavor, potassium citrate, agar-agar, Red 40, xanthan gum.

You can bet that no self-respecting bear would ever eat "Red #40" And yet this is what we feed our growing children.

The reason we're all gaining those pounds is that we're eating something that's not even real food. Processed foods shouldn't even be called food. They're addictive and destructive substances and just like the music industry is exploiting Miley Cyrus, the FDA, government subsidies and companies like Kraft and Betty Crocker are exploiting your taste buds by making you addicted to this garbage.

The police want drugs off the streets?! What about getting processed foods out of our stores! The biggest addiction out there isn't to a street drug, it's to processed foods, and the result of this nationwide addiction has left our health care system crumbling over the costs of obesity and all of it's consequences.

What I did to lose my 25 lbs in a slow and controlled manner (meaning, over several months to a year): I went 80% paleo - sticking to as natural of foods as possible, and giving myself the treat of gluten-free bread occasionally, or using baking soda to make gluten-free/dairy-free zucchini and carrot muffins. I put almond milk in my coffee, which has xantham gum in it, but you won't find canola oil or corn syrup in there.

And most importantly: exercise. I found the secret to making my body strong and building muscle without bulking: throughout the week I alternate yoga, weight aerobics/weight lifting, and my cardio (running). Mixing it up throughout the week allows me to increase my endurance but also my strength.

So the real secret to anyone wanting to lose the extra weight and to get strong again is simple:

1. Stay away from processed foods and eat a more natural diet focusing on vegetables and limiting your grains. Grains help you keep on the weight. And don't forget your healthy fats like coconut, walnut, avocado and fish - they'll support your body's tissues - NOT cause you to gain more fat.
2. Exercise: a good combination of cardio, weights and balance (with flexibility as a bonus!)
3. Give yourself some days to rest and work on your ability to manage and adapt to stress. 

I'm living proof that it works. Don't expect Dumbledore to appear on your doorstep, wave a wand and give you a healthy body by magic. This takes dedication and will-power - the power to overcome the addiction to garbage foods.

Your metabolism doesn't rule you. You rule your metabolism. Eat a protein-rich breakfast every morning and exercise regularly (4-5x/week) and you will begin to gain control over your body. And most importantly, don't starve yourself! If you start calorie-counting and depriving yourself of food, your body will go into starvation mode and you will hang onto every ounce of fat as a protective mechanism.

Making changes part 3 - Say Yes to Love

In saying yes to love, I'm referring to love in all respects:

1) Love yourself,
2) Accept love from others, and
3) Fall in love with the universe

The first two are probably the hardest. Loving yourself goes hand-in-hand with finding joy in your life and wanting to take care of yourself. If you're having a difficult time with this one it's probably time to look a little deeper.

I read an interesting article on how childhood experiences and traumas can lead to chronic illness. This might bring up a lot for you, but if you can't find a way to love yourself, then that marks a great opportunity to talk to someone (a friend or family member and especially a health care professional, such as naturopathic doctor/intern). Discussing any issues with someone on the "outside" is a great way to get a different perspective and to find the barriers that are preventing you from loving and growing.

Being able to accept love from others also falls under this category. Like a protective wall that isolates you, the guard is up and maybe it's time to explore just what that wall is actually doing for you. Ask what you are protecting yourself from. What feelings come up? Again, this is all best to talk through with a professional who can guide you through this journey.

How amazing is it that these lions are spooning?!

Keep in mind that this isn't magic and that changes take time, but I commend anyone who goes out and seeks help - even if it's just to talk things out. I've been lucky enough in my life to have that support system through my own naturopathic interns at the college as well as from our amazing student counselor. I'm pretty sure I would have gone crazy had I not had an outlet to get my thoughts and feelings out.

Fall in love with the universe:
I hate Toronto. I can't wait until the day that I can get out of this city. Away from the GTA, away from the 401 highway... I just can't stand big city life. But all of that aside, if someone were to drape a blanket over the whole city... if all the lights were extinguished and the sounds were silenced, you'd be left with a section of the planet, and you'd be able to see the sky and space above you.

Every so often, take a moment to appreciate our world. Seriously be grateful for all that we have. Be thankful for the stars, for the moon, for the way the sky lights up in pinks and purples while the sun sets. Be thankful for great bodies of freshwater. Appreciate all of the species that live in that water and for the circle of life that keeps all of those species procreating over decades. Fall in love with fresh farmed vegetables and appreciate farmers who properly take care of their animals, letting them graze in pasture and who decline to inject them with growth hormones and other fake atrocities.

Lastly, let me leave you with this: It's funny how we always turn to talking about the weather. It's a classic small-talk conversation, but maybe that's a reason for it. How amazing is it that our weather can be different every single day and we really don't have any control over it (not including global warming, but just in general). There's no button you can press that can stop the wind from blowing, or a rope you can pull to make the sun "stay in the sky" longer. If it starts raining... you're screwed. Or maybe you'll take a moment to have that perfect kiss in the rain.


The world is always better when it is filled with love and appreciation.

Going Braless

I love Thursdays. Thursdays are my day off of clinic and it brings me so much joy to not wear clinic clothes. Especially with the heat wave we've had... dress pants and white lab coats are totally counter-productive when it comes to letting my body breathe.

I've always been the type of person to love comfy clothes. I love coming home, putting on pajamas, or wearing track pants all winter long. But new trend I've started with myself is going braless. I call it "Braless Thursdays".

I almost forgot what it was like to not have an underwire constantly nestled under my boobs... to not have straps on my shoulders all day long. Leaning back on a chair or couch and all I feel is my back - not the clasp digging into my spine.

Then there's the sports bra. I wear one at some point almost every single day when I workout. And it's not just any sports bra, but the most heavy-duty Lululemon bra that straps down the girls better than duct tape could. Like a tight elastic that holds them so close to my body that sometimes I'm afraid they'll disappear into my chest cavity. But it sure does hold up to the bounce test!

Sometimes the girls just have to breathe and so I have given them that freedom. It's not for attention, or to seem overtly sexual in public, but more for just comfort and to remove the restriction that's there the other 6 days of the week.

You could say I'm still "young and perky" and with my breast reduction, no longer have all of that extra weight pulling down from my chest, pulling at my shoulders and back. So I'm lucky in that respect.

I think we're all entitled to our braless days -without any judgement. And if you do stare at me in public, the thought in my head is that you're sad that your bra is clasped tight around you and mine is left in a drawer at home.

There's no bra-burning party about to happen, but maybe a good ol' fashion high five for comfort!

Dance like no one's watching

I've always supported the idea of dancing like no one's watching... and literally doing it. It's one of the ways I deal with the stress of city driving and being in a car for far too long. If I drive alone, I'm usually playing my music at a volume loud enough that I can't hear the squeaking of my car's link stabilizers. I'm wearing my super fun purple Florida sunglasses. I'm dancing in my seat with hands moving (except for the one on the steering wheel), my head bobbing back and forth, singing along as I please.

Well, I finally got caught... by two guys in another car, one of which gave me a huge thumbs-up and completely approved of my car dancing behaviour. And the thing was that I really didn't care. I actually laughed at the whole situation and gave the guy a thumbs-up in return, then continued to enjoy my singing/dancing car time.

Maybe that's one of our problems... why some of us are so self-conscious. When it comes to self-expression, why do we always care what other people think of us?

On Wednesday, some friends and I drove up to Peterborough to see Walk off the Earth at the music festival. Usually concerts are pretty lively, however, due to the nature of this being a free concert in a small northern-ish city (well, it's north of Toronto... so to all the city people you could call it "northern"), it was packed with families and older couples. I have never been to a concert where the crowd was so stagnant. I mean, a lot of people were standing, but hardly anyone was moving, or dancing or really seemed to be enjoying the music. So I danced, because I couldn't not. I think I would actually feel more awkward standing completely still during a good song.

It's liberating to be able to move however you want. And I really couldn't care less what anyone else thought. I actually thought it was soooo weird to have a crowd that huge gathered around to listen to music and no one really looked like they were fully enjoying it.  If they weren't so attentive to what was going on on the stage, you would have thought they were bored. As OMC once said, "How Bizarre"?!

I think there is actually something mentally and emotionally different between those of us who feel free enough and comfortable enough to dance in public, and those who are just too shy or embarrassed. I'm not quite sure where it all stems from, but that whole mentality can be changed. The next time you get the chance, you should try it and notice the difference in yourself on the Bubbliness scale. Dancing to music you love is totally bubbly-making.  I mean, geez... even my Nana does it, and she's one of the most hilarious and happy people I know.

I've just gotten to the point where although I'm trying to maintain a professional image, I also need to keep my soul healthy and happy, and that comes through self-expression. 

Case and point: the president of our school just walked past the student lounge, where I alone am laying on one of the couches laughing out loud while watching How I Met Your Mother on my laptop (and yes, I'm on clinic shift right now). And although I was pretty surprised to see him in this area of the school, it didn't stop me from continuing my morning lounge time.

Sometimes (and I mean everyday) you need to do something that makes you happy, no matter who may be watching.

Dance, because it feels amazing. Laugh, because it will make you live longer.  Put them both together and that's bubbly :)

Weighing in on the clothing size debate

There's been a lot of talk lately about how angry and upset women are getting that popular clothing brands don't carry sizes above a 10 or 12. The latest one I've heard of is a girl getting upset that Lululemon doesn't make pants larger than a size 12 and that their size 12 is actually smaller than women realize.

I've heard much debate and wanted to give my two cents.

First off, I should tell you the story about my own similar problem. Back in the day when I was a 38DD bra size, going shopping was an absolute nightmare. I cried every single time I was in a dressing room. Everyone at my school shopped at LaSenza and could get really cute underthings and all I wanted was to not be stuck in granny bras. You know what I'm talking about. The flesh coloured bras with 4-5 clasps at the back and straps that were as wide as the ones on my backpack.

It might be shallow, but they were the least attractive things I've ever seen. I remember going into Jacob one day and after frantically searching their bras, realized they didn't carry anything larger than a 34C. I was so upset. I mean, they weren't even fancy designed bras, just ones that didn't look so dated. And of course, I went to LaSenza, which luckily had a few in my size, but of course, they all have extra padding for that push-up effect. At 19 years old, and DDs on my chest, I really didn't need any pushing up.

So I can totally appreciate the fact that younger women want to feel attractive and not wear their grandmother's bras. As well, I know how heartbreaking it is when you go into a store that doesn't even make a size large enough for you. But walking out of Jacob that day, I made peace with the fact that I could never shop there. And as you know from an older blog post, I decided to change my body. Because of that change, I've also lost 20lbs (not including the boob tissue from the surgery).

One listener on The Edge radio commented that Lululemon is technically active wear and that (remember, these aren't my words) perhaps these women either don't need fancy expensive clothes to wear while doing yoga, or they should use these sizing limitations as a goal to lose weight in order to fit into those sizes.

This debate can take many sides:
1) Does everyone really need the opportunity to spend $110 on Lululemon pants? When I first started working out post-surgery, I was wearing a sports bra that I had bought from Sears as well as old tank tops and shorts. My comfy pants came from Old Navy... and they were $15.

2) Sometimes we need to get over the fact that a brand isn't made for us. Just like me with Jacob lingerie. It's not the end of the world. There are alternatives.

3) You can't get mad at a company for not catering to every single body type and size. They are running a business, and people come in a bazillion different shapes and sizes. It would be impossible to to make every single human look like a rockstar in one clothing line.

4) The goal is to find a piece of workout clothing that fits you like a champ and stick to it. Lululemon makes many different types of sports bras, but only one style of theirs actually fits me well and stops my boobs from bouncing while running. So I had to make peace with buying one style of bra in a few different colours, because not all of their styles fit. It's the same with other companies.

5) If wearing Lululemon really means that much to you, like it's the end of the world if you can't wear Lululemon pants, then make it a goal to get down to that size. If you take offense to that, then there are probably deeper issues at hand that need to be worked through.

6) Abercrombie and Fitch made some pretty terrible comments regarding who their target market was (only the cool kids in school) and about not making XL sizes. They apologized later for their remarks, but if a company's CEO is a complete asshole, why on earth would you want to support that company in the first place? It's called a boycott, and it's pretty easy to do when their stores wreak of cologne from 50 feet away. How do you not get a headache from just walking in there? (Ditto with Hollister).

Sometimes it's just not worth the energies to fight with these companies. Recognize that we're not all built the same, and that we all can't fit into the same clothing. This isn't Starfleet... Lululemon isn't a uniform that all humans must wear. We should stop letting clothing companies define who the "cool kids" are. Just be yourself, and be happy with yourself. If you're not, then find some help to get to a place and a body size that you're comfortable with.

As the wise Dumbledore once said, "Help with always be given [at Hogwarts] to those who ask for it."

I never thought I'd be upset about losing weight...

This week I had to try on my Maid of Honor dress for my sister's wedding. I was excited yet a little uneasy at the same time. I mean, you want to fit into your dress the first time - sans alterations.

I have to admit I was pretty upset when I tried on the dress and realized it was like 6 sizes too big for me. I mean, the dress is beautiful, but without it fitting properly, my mood had seriously declined... especially since alterations would cost another $60 on top of the already frightening price of the dress.

In all honesty, I've bought beautiful formal/party dresses from Forever 21 for $35, so spending more than $150 on a dress feels like I'm being stabbed and gutted.

So how did this happen?! I mean, it's been 2 months and I've shrunk that much? I should have seen it coming.. I wore a size 2 dress from David's Bridal for our school's formal, so I should have said something when the lady at the dress shop ordered me a size 10 for this wedding.

The truth is that there is no "herbal magic" or miracle weight loss drug. It's not even stress-induced weight loss. Shocking! I know! It was simple diet and exercise. I'm very lucky to not have any underlying medical conditions that affect my metabolism or make it difficult to loose the weight naturally. But don't hate me yet - this has been a huge struggle all my life.

I've always had a gut, ever since I was a little kid. It has stayed with me all my life and I never thought I would be able to change. In undergrad I worked out all the time, I tried eating healthy, I made almost all of my own meals. I ate my Special K with skim milk every single morning, and yet although I was in good cardio shape, I still couldn't see the changes in my body fast enough.

So what was the secret for me? I think the best thing that I've done was go gluten-free, dairy-free; I also eliminate (to the best that I can) soy, corn, refined white sugar, nitrates, nitrites, food additives/preservatives, food colouring, and non-organic meat or corn-fed beef. Again, it's not ALWAYS possible. I try to stay 70% paleo, with the other 30% being rice. I can't help my sushi addiction or get rid of my brown rice toast in the morning. I mean, a girl's gotta eat! And if I go long periods of time without eating I'm the grumpiest grumpy-pants ever! In my family we call it "Kingitis" (since our last name is King). We're all very good at diagnosing it. As soon as one of us gets snappy at the others, we order them to go eat something otherwise they are banished from our presence. 

But diet alone didn't change everything. I have to workout 4-5 times per week, doing an hour of my weight aerobics (strength training with tiny intervals of cardio). I say "I have to" because I'm addicted to working out. I get really antsy if I miss working out for more than 2-3 days in a row.

So really, I blame the combination of diet and exercise on my latest weight loss. It's funny that this is truly what can make you get into shape but everyone wants an easier answer. Never waste your time on diet fads or products that claim to be a "weight-loss miracle". If you don't have any medical condition that prevents you from it, diet and exercise truly can change your body. It takes time and dedication. Like I said, I've been fighting my belly my entire life, so I understand the frustration. But when you start to see results, it makes it all worth it. Every time someone goes out for takeout or fast food and you can't order anything... it's depressing. But in the end, it's actually a blessing. Yes, you can't have that fast and easy meal, but you can make better things. More delicious things! Things that your body will take and love you for.

My goal is to keep my body in shape for our vacation in May. To show my dedication, I'll post my before and after beach body (the before shot being a vacation pic from 2008).

Where there is will-power, there is a way :)

Let's talk about Boobies

As of this weekend, our spring vacation is booked and we're jetting off to Florida for a week. In a typical Sarah fashion (which is a foreshadowing pun), I glanced in my closet, excited to pack away all my summer clothes for beach time.

But it wasn't always this easy for me. I actually get excited for bathing suit shopping now, where in the past I used to cry with every mall trip - no jokes. But it was the same with bra shopping. No one carried a 38DD bra or bikini size or higher than that. And if they did, my choices were limited and it was still depressing each time I had to try something on.

Me in late high school. My "before" picture

Yes, that's right, I used to be a DD/E.

And I wonder how many of you actually think there was something wrong with that. I want to tell my story because high school was so brutal for me, and many girls like myself will go through body image issues, so it's important that we talk about things like this. Plus, sometimes it's just nice to get things off of your chest (haha... man, I'm on a roll today).

Starting in grade 10 the girls grew an entire cup size every single year until I was a DD/E. You'd think this would be every girl's dream, but for me it was a nightmare. I was labeled as a huge pair of boobs and nothing else. I would walk home from school, and middle-aged men would be hanging halfway out their driver's side window, honking their car horn at me and whistling at me, to the point where I dreaded every moment that I saw a car approaching me.

Least to say, it was my "identifier" in high school. I would walk down the hallway at school - and I remember this one moment were the hallway was empty except for a group of about 3-4 guys sitting on the floor. As I walked passed them (literally feet away from them), one of them yelled out "Those were the biggest jugs I've ever seen!!!" To which I turned toward them and shot them a dirty look - but it didn't phase them at all. They weren't looking at my face. I felt pretty worthless.

Granted it's nice to get noticed. And I liked the attention for about 2 seconds until I realized just how negative the attention was. The small boosts of self-esteem didn't last long and I realized I wasn't getting noticed for me, just for a body part. And really, who wants to be liked just for their boobs?

It took me a couple years to realize just how ashamed I was of my body. I didn't even want to show them to guys I was dating because I thought my boobs where hideous and was afraid they would have their "hypnotic" effects, making me (or at least my face) relatively invisible again.

When I was 20 I decided I'd had enough. It was hard enough dressing myself - because really, they don't make clothes for regular girls with giant chests - and working out was a joke. No sports bra in the world could have made me feel comfortable while running.

So I saw a surgeon who was able to give me a reduction (thanks to the government's amazing funding... I think it's the only good thing the government has actually done for me), and I was able to start a "new life". Everything was completely different for me and I've never regretted the decision even for a second. I was able to get myself back in shape, and for the first time, I actually felt normal.

Puerto Rico, 2012

Boat Cruise vacation, 2012

 I'm a B cup (if you're curious) and I've never been happier with my body. Bikini and bra shopping are actually fun now. I don't have to scramble through the store looking to see if they even carry DD or larger sizes (sidenote: at the time Jacob didn't carry anything bigger than a C cup - I gave the woman who worked there the most panicked and disgusted look when she said this).

But I think it's really important for our younger generation to realize how we treat others. Just because someone may seem really confident on the outside, doesn't mean they feel that confidence on the inside. There were a lot of times I had to put on a show (so to speak) and act like I was fine with everything, but at the end of the day, when I was home, I was so unhappy.

Treat women like human beings, not like a pair of breasts. And if you're truly unhappy with your body, then talk to someone! My parents were extremely understanding of my decision and supported me the entire way.